He took a hike, all right. All the way to South America.

You know it is a slow news day when the AP assigns reporters to call up every governor in America to ask "what are you doing?"

Maybe we should put them all on Twitter. Would have loved the see the post from Gov. Sandford last week. "Having empanadas and a nice red wine after spending the day schtupping my mistress! Shhh...don't tell the wife!"

Whoops, that was more than 140, wasn't it? Still, beats the heck out of this long winded confession. And a heck of a lot more honest.

"What are you in for, kid?" "Creativity."

I am always willing to give an artist a pass when the art is clever, cool and thought-provoking. Like this traffic barrel sculpture by Joseph Carnevale.

Too bad the cops in Raleigh didn't have much of a sense of humor. You know, if even the company that owns the materials doesn't want to press charges, then why make a case out of it? Laugh into your coffee cups and let him go.

Job security

Okay, I am officially never going to another outdoor ATM until the employment figures improve:

Turn the other cheek...and they'll slap it, too

I love my mother, but sometimes I wish she had raised me to be less polite and more of a bitch. I am hard-wired by decades of home training to smile and eat sh*t politely, with a knife and fork, when what I really want to do is go nuclear on some cretin that absolutely deserves it.

Currently the cretin in question is a sour, lazy, useless lump of flesh that works as the evening parking man at my office garage. He has been giving me a hard time since he came to work there, one week ago. Every day, it's something. Argued with me about getting me my keys, parked my car half in a space so the back end was hanging out in traffic and primed to get hit, left my car keys on the front counter where anyone could have grabbed they instead of putting them in the key safe where they belong. I don't know why he even has a job. But today was the cherry on the sundae. I go get my keys, come back and find that my car is...you guessed it...unlocked. Greeeaat! I turn around to have a word with the idiot, and find that he is abandoning his post at top speed, running out of the garage and down the street. I noticed my gym bag has been moved, so I reach inside and lo and behold my mp3 player case is missing. My 150 dollar mp3 player that my MOTHER BOUGHT ME, YOU ASSHOLE.

I will spend half my night looking for it. I will look absolutely every possible where it could even remotely be. But I will not find it. Because I know that it was in my gym bag this morning, just as sure as I know that it is not there now. Just as sure as I know my car was locked when I left it this morning, and wasn't locked when I found it this evening. And as sure as I know that my little mp3 player did not suddenly sprout legs and sentience and decide to hightail it for the border, I know that that grimy little pissant stole it.

A Winning Skin!

I love this! Even though the only Mac I currently own sits in my makeup drawer, I think this is freakin' cool!
Unboxing XSKN at Mac World from Sukhjit Ghag on Vimeo. I love simple solutions for problems. They are universally elegant.

Oh, someday, Mac you shall be mine!

NY Post is missing a link

I tend to be overly forgiving when it comes to gaffes, faux-pas, and general stupidity, but I have to send a back-of-head smack to the NY Post's ed-in-chief Col Allan on this one. I'm going to give a pass to cartoonist Sean Delonas, because a cartoonist is bound to create images that push the envelope. That's what they do.

But, Allan, old chap, the reason you have a job with the word "EDITOR" stenciled on your door, is because you have the good sense to balance the statement-making with good taste and sensitivity. You went to college, and a very good one I'd imagine. You sat through similar English classes as I did, learning all about metaphors, and the same history classes, getting a in-depth education on the colorful colloquialisms of the racist along with the lectures on the Civil Rights movement. And if you skipped those classes to play hacky-sack on the lawn of the administration building, surely you must have caught a few episodes of "All in the Family." You have to know the hot button insults and innuendos. People are talking a lot about a "post-racial" America, which the election of Obama has ushered in, but I think some have mis-interpreted the idea. This doesn't mean that we are in a cultural free-for-all where racial jokes can be bandied about and no one is allowed get offended.

Yes, the political cartoonist's job is to poke holes in egos of the talking heads that run this place, but the cartoon that Allan let slip by him isn't just offensive. It lazy. It's a cheap laugh for some, and a great way to stir up some controversy. But it really flushes my respect for the cartoonist as a thinker and Allan as a editor.

Sirius-ly?

I can't even wrap my head around investing $530 million in something as ailing as Sirius Radio. Especially in an economy where people are being forced to cut back on the luxuries they used to afford themselves. Satellite radio is just another semi-pricey gimmick for the "inconvenience intolerant." God forbid we should be forced to listen to yet another car ad, or local restaurant pitch, when for just about $200 bucks a year, we can sail through life advertising-free.

I've experienced sat-radio in rental cars before. It's a nice perk, having channel after channel of music or comedy (which admittedly you can't get on earth-bound radio, and I think that is a shame), but I just can't see myself paying money every month just to listen to radio without commercials. Paying for the pleasure of listening with my passive time, seems a better deal to me than actually digging into my wallet and coughing up cold, hard cash.